Wednesday, July 11, 2007

The Thrill Is Gone

When I introduce myself in Dallas as having just moved from Nashville, people have brought up several topics. Some talk about country music. Others mention the Titans. The third topic of conversation? The new law that anyone buying beer in a store must be carded. Yes, it is true. If Granny Clampett wants to buy some Bud Lite, she is required to produce her ID to prove that she is at least 21.

Of course, nearly everyone other than the legislators who voted for it think that the law is an inane waste of time. However, The Oracle has noted that some of the most virulent criticism of the requirement has come from women. I have a theory on that, though I will probably regret stating it.

The truth is that up until now, women have loved to be carded. Women over 30 especially love to be carded. The Oracle could retire from his real job and blog full-time if he had a dollar for every time he has heard a woman laugh about being asked for an ID. Such a seeming inconvenience permits a woman to enjoy the delusion that with the help of hair color that came out of a bottle and sufficient amounts of appropriately applied make up filling in the crow's feet, that she looks to be in the neighborhood of 21. In fact, a woman will sometimes provide as proof that she looks young for her age the fact that she still gets asked for her ID. Of course, men know this and ask for ID's just to provide women with this illusory joy.

Now, that thrill has been taken away. Sure, our 32 year old friend who vainly wishes to be mistaken for 22 will be asked for her ID. But, so will Granny Clampett.


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